I like to sit down to piss

When I first started doing this it made perfect sense; when you wake up at 4 am to take a leak, who wants to get blasted by the bathroom light? If I sat down I could piss in the dark. One time I woke up with a raging hard-on that wasn't going anywhere. So instead of pulling an act of contortion at the toilet, I went outside and let it flow in all it's rainbow arcing glory. There's something so natural about pissing outside. Whenever I feel my testerone levels dipping I just piss outside, makes 'em spike back up with a quickness. When I was done (I swear to god it was over two minutes of uninterrupted flow), I went back inside and proceeded to walk face first into my sliding glass door at full speed. Fuck that hurt. I spent the next three hours with a throbbing head and a boner. But anway yeah, if you sit down to piss at night you don't have to turn the light on.